Last weekend I was with family — tons of family and it was a blast. Much of our time we discussed things we did or said in years past. Some memories made me laugh out loud as if I were standing there all over again. Some memories never made it to my memory bank. Some memories made me cringe as I relived something or sat in sadness hearing someone’s story.
Listening to stories told by my siblings, I realized that we lived in different worlds. We could have been neighbors instead of siblings. Born from the same parents we had some shared memories but mainly from big events like the house burning down, a death, wedding, or a car accident.
The other things – birthdays, school days, neighborhood friends, escapades, successes, failures and other milestones were only lived by each of us individually. Did we all cocoon and close away on purpose or were we so involved in surviving that we didn’t pay attention?
Is this how it was for you or was my family the exception? I’d love to go back in time and pay attention to the events and remember the interactions and be more present.
But I can’t – so instead I made sure I made real memories at the wedding last week. I talked one-on-one with my sibs, with their kids and other family members. I’ll try to be more present now …so that they will have memories of me in the future.
4 thoughts on “2 Parents: 10 Different Stories”
I always thought you were very close with all of your huge family. I know what you mean…I have one brother and one sister. My sister and I have virtually nothing in common and she seems not to want to make any effort to find common ground. It makes me very sad….
I love that you are making an effort to KNOW them all now.
happy weekend Marge!
Actually, this is more common than we think. When I speak to my siblings about events from our childhood, they have their own versions which are often different from mine. Sometimes, they will provide a detail I missed and vise versa… I find that so intriguing as it speaks to that whole notion of perception and interpretation. 🙂
Thanks Steph! One weekend with family in Neb and one weekend with girlfriends in Grand Lake doing Walk for a Cure … The weekend weather, conversation and hiking were amazing!
I wish I could go back and journal some of the events that happened. Where there are no shared memories, it’s hard to connect 40 years later! And the memories that we did share were big events and usually sad ones. Thanks for your comments!