Crash moments: When everything changes

We’ve all had these ‘crash moments’ in our world. When everything that kept us busy and struggling the night before is gone and something HUGE is on the table. We immediately take stock of our lives and determine what’s most important. The little things fall away. The overcrowded schedules disappear, family meals matter more, communication and honesty are incorporated into conversations again. 

I love family. I have over thirty nieces and nephews across the globe. Some I know very well, some not at all. They are figuring it out, day by day, like I did at their age. They have issues. They have exciting news. They have problems. They feel lost. They feel misunderstood. They are happy. They are struggling. We’ve all been there, haven’t we? Now with a generation under me working through the same issues… I can be of help to them by listening. This process of life is where the learning happens.

Attending a family wedding last weekend, and listening to trials and tribulations my relatives were going through reminded me of my life at that age. My life back then included my husband, two sons, job choices, college expenses, high school graduations, baseball and soccer practices and schedules – until a diagnosis arrived and all the noise was eliminated in a second. Then the focus turned to what mattered most – family.

We’ve all had these ‘crash moments’ in our world. When everything that kept us busy and struggling the night before is gone and something HUGE is on the table. We immediately take stock of our lives and determine what’s most important. The little things fall away. The overcrowded schedules disappear, family meals matter more, communication and honesty are incorporated into conversations again.

Then, out of the decade of health, ill-health, illness and death – came the time to start anew. Whether I liked it or not – I was single again.  Saying goodbye was hard and yet, I was 48 years old and knew that there was no turning back. The role of wife was over. The plan to grow old with the man I married was gone. That took place 15 years ago. And, over time, I’ve found my place once again. New friends. New location. With the same love and appreciation for family.

Currently, my family members are dealing topics such as sadness, money issues, drug issues, love issues, and so many other ‘first-world’ problems. Their issues are real. Their sadness, confusion, heartache, and pain are all real. What I want for them is a wake-up call to help them let the petty stuff go so they can remember that time is finite.

Family matters. Love matters.

As long as we have food, shelter, family and love… we really have it all, don’t we?


I heard the term CRASH MOMENTS from Carla Moore. She literally survived a car accident and came out of it with a new look at her life and all the things she left unfinished. She was not ready to die but the accident gave her many reasons to live.
Carla Moore

I listened to the podcast Do It Scared and heard the interview with Carla Moore by Ruth Soukup (Episode #60)


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